Taste of His Own Medicine
by Gypsy Love
Summary: Ashley and Manny toy with Craig's feelings like he toyed with theirs...an emotional killing spree.
1. Chapter 1

As Manny reached across to put the stage make up on her Ashley noticed the bracelet flashing on her wrist. The gold charm bracelet with little ice skates on it. She'd seen that bracelet before. She'd seen it in the bag at Craig's house when she was freezing in his garage. Christmas presents. The Ramones vintage tee, the pink scarf, the bracelet. She'd thought they were all for her. The tee shirt was perfect, just her style. The scarf and the bracelet were, well, sweet and all but not exactly her taste. But she thought Craig was just off the mark, had bought things for her he thought she'd like. But it was all clear now. They weren't for her at all.

"That's a pretty bracelet. Where'd you get it?" Ashley said, and saw that look on Manny's face. One look that told her everything she needed to know.

"Oh, just this guy I've been seeing…"

"Who?"

"Just a guy…"

"Was it Craig?"

"He didn't want me to say anything…" Manny was uncomfortable, looking at the bracelet and not at her, "because he moved on so quickly…"

"Moved on? We're still together," Even as she said the words she felt the lie they had become. That they were all along. Only she'd just found out.

Ashley felt a strange coldness. A coldness that started in her stomach and spread slowly like water to all her extremities. Arctic cold. She felt flattened.

Manny started to turn away. Ashley grabbed her arm.

"Manny, do me a favor,"

Manny looked at her with her sad eyes, quivering lip. With awe and a deepening coldness Ashley saw that Manny loved him, too.

"Don't tell Craig. Don't, don't say anything yet, okay? Please?"

Manny looked at her a moment longer with her on the edge of tears look, nodded, and turned away.

Ashley didn't know exactly why she wanted it kept quiet. It just seemed that maybe it was time she knew more than Craig.

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They stood on the edge of the stage waiting for their cue. The hurt and the betrayal kept coming, slamming into her like punches, like kicks. Each one with its little truth, 'he lied', 'he cheated', 'he loves Manny'. But she loved him. Felt the delirious happy overwhelmed love feeling when he was near her and she missed him fiercely when he was not. But now she was starting to hate him, for lying to her, for trampling on her trust. All the turmoil showed on her face like worry. Craig misread it as stage freight.

"We'll be great," he said, put his arm around her. She wanted to cry.

Their song was a blur. Maybe she missed notes, sang off key. Maybe her sadness added a depth to the words. When it was over and everyone was clapping the tears blurred her eyes, and she stood with Craig and took a bow.

"You were awesome," Craig said, looking at her with his sleepy eyes, the same love in them as before. But now she saw duplicity. She saw secrets. 'How could you?' she thought, her own voice so loud in her head she was surprised he hadn't heard it.

"Uh, you, too," she said, throwing the compliment back at him, looking at him from the corner of her eye. And she saw that he was watching her, trying to tell if she suspected him, if she knew. He was watchful. He was a liar.

"Listen, Craig, I don't feel so well. I think maybe I'd better go home,"

"What's wrong?" His immediate concern, worried eyes, and behind that she saw the wheels turning. If she went home he could go and be with Manny. Which was, of course, what he would do.

"Flu, maybe. I just…I'll see you later," Turned on her heel and marched off. That goddamn liar.


	2. Chapter 2

Ashley felt cold with the knowledge that Craig was cheating. Manny felt like someone was squeezing her heart, stopping the beating and the blood flow and leaving her dead.

In the hallway after the show, Craig and her alone. He looked so cute and so sweet in that tee shirt with the plaid shirt over it. His hair long and curly, longer than it was last year when she met him, when he first came to Degrassi.

"Manny," he said, pulling her with him to an empty room behind the stage. Her eyes brimming with tears, lips quivering, the tightening feeling making it hard to breathe, she just looked at him.

She wanted to say, 'Where's Ashley? You never left her, not like you said you did so where is she?' But Ashley said not to say anything and in a way she didn't want to.

"Manny," he said again and leaned toward her, kissed her softly on the lips. And she closed her eyes and kissed him back. She couldn't help it, she loved him. Loved him since the day she saw him get out of his father's car and climb the front steps to the school, camera strap over his shoulder. Black leather jacket. She can close her eyes and see it still.

"What's wrong?" he said, pulling away, seeing her dark eyes filled with tears.

"It's uh…it's nothing," She swallowed hard on all the hurt, the betrayal like a lump in her throat. She didn't want it to be like this. She wanted him to be in love with her, and only her. When he had come to the skating rink calling her name, coming onto the ice and nearly falling, telling her it was her and not Ashley, she had believed him. Believed him with all her heart.

"Okay. Well, can you come to my garage tonight?" His half smile, pleading eyes. It was on the tip of her tongue to ask him about Ashley. 'Where is she? Where is she?' And things were clearing up. Always in his garage, or empty classrooms, or in the ravine. Always hidden. From Joey, from his friends, a secret. For him she was the other woman. She narrowed her eyes at him. And his expression, puzzled, but under the puzzlement he knew what she might have discovered. Just like Ashley Manny could see this, see how he was careful and cautious about these lies, how he looked to see if she knew.

"Can you?" he said, taking her hands, kissing them.

"Yeah, yes. Of course I can," She smiled up at him. He smiled back, and she saw the relief in his eyes. She saw it clearly.

In his garage, the cold barely touched by the space heaters, he wrapped his arms around her and she wanted to cry. This was where she wanted to be, always. Why did he have to lie to her, love Ashley, too?

"You sang good. You and Ashley. It was a good performance,"

"Thanks," He ducked his head, pressed his lips together like he does. Manny cleared her throat.

"So…so you can tell her now, tell her about us," She tried to look into his eyes, but he wouldn't look at her.

"Right?"

He wouldn't look at her. His eyes were everywhere else.

"Yeah, yep. Right," he said.

Liar, Manny thought. But right then it didn't really matter because she was laying on the couch and he was laying on top of her. His weight crushing and comforting, everywhere he touched her felt electric. Liar. She flicked his tongue with hers, trailed her fingertips over his shoulder blades. Ashley was between them, maybe she always would be.

"I love you, Manny," he said, his voice husky, just above a whisper.

"I love you, too,"


	3. Chapter 3

It was cold, snow everywhere. It was how she felt, cold. Manny unwrapped the scarf from her neck, unzipped her winter coat.

"What do you want? Coffee? Hot chocolate?" Ashley said, standing by the counter. They were at the Dot.

"Huh? Oh. Hot chocolate,"

Manny looked at the flippy ends of Ashley's hair, thought maybe Craig had run his fingers through her hair.

Ashley came back to the table with a coffee and the hot chocolate, whip cream on top.

"Thanks," Manny said, and sipped it, even though it was still too hot. Ashley looked at her steadily with her calm blue eyes.

"So," Manny said, licking the whip cream off her upper lip, "what did you have in mind?"

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Walking home alone, the snow and the sky the same blue tinged white. Her fingertips and the tip of her nose getting numb. Ashley's words ringing in her ears.

"Let's give him a taste of his own medicine," she had said, "he's not the only one who can cheat and lie and make people jealous. Let's tear him apart, like he did to us,"

Manny had stared at her with wide eyes, looked off to the side at the windows, cold winter light hurting her eyes. Ashley had a point, of course she did, but she didn't really want to hurt Craig. She loved him more than she was mad at him.

"Okay, Manny? What do you say?"

She'd finished off her hot chocolate, looked down.

"Manny? Okay?"

"Yeah. Ashley. Okay,"

Walking home, her footfalls oddly loud and echoing in the cold afternoon. Ashley was devious, enlisting Paige and Spinner and Jimmy to drop hints that she was cheating, kissing boys in dark movie theaters, that Ashley was cheating, going to rock concerts with Montreal boys, riding around that city with them in flashy cars, drunk on their thick French accents. Everyone lying to Craig to make him paranoid and angry and jealous. But he did it first. He lied to her. She supposed he deserved it.

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'You goddamn liar,' Ashley thought, the thought amplified in her brain, 'liar'. But he was still so sexy, that curly hair, those big dark hazel eyes, his wide smile. He was kissing her, his eyes half shut, his hand trailing from her shirt to the button of her jeans.

They heard Joey's car, and Joey liked to come up here to ruin their fun. Craig reluctantly pulled away from her, his breathing quick, his eyes staring into hers. And all she could think about was Manny. Manny the vixen with her long black hair and olive skin, and Manny was nothing like her, naïve girl, sweet innocent girl and what did he see in her?

Joey's footsteps on the stairs outside and Craig's breathing had slowed, and he stood up, fixed his hair with his hands but it just fell back the same way.

"Hi, guys," Joey said.

"Hi,"

"Is Ashley staying for dinner?" he said to Craig, and Craig looked at her.

"Want to?" he said.

"Um, no, I can't," she said, "I've got something I have to do," Evasive. Let Craig think she was covering up and giving him half-truths.

"What?" he said, taking the bait.

"Uh, nothing much. Nothing really, it's just this, this place I said I'd go to with my, uh, my mom," 'Take that,' Ashley thought.

"Oh. Okay," he said, a hurt little puzzlement creeping into his voice, and Ashley did her best to look like she wasn't feeling guilty.

'I'll teach you to cheat on me,' she thought, and Craig looked down at the floor.


	4. Chapter 4

"Dude, what is wrong?" Spinner smiled a half smile, his stoner look. Craig kind of thought he might smoke pot, he didn't know. But Spinner always reminded him of that guy in the movie Fast Times at Ridgemont High, that guy Spiccoli.

"What? Nothing," They were sitting at the ice skating rink, watching their sisters on the ice.

"And dude, what are you even doing here? I mean, aren't you dating two girls? I'd think that would take up your precious 'watching little kids skate' time,"

"Spin? Shutup," Craig looked away from him in disgust because, as usual, Spinner had a point. He was dating two girls, he couldn't seem to break up with either of them, and juggling them had taken up a lot of free time, except lately, well, he had more time than he was used to.

"So where are they?" Spinner said, his smile wide now.

"Who?" Craig said, not looking at him, not acknowledging him, trying to find Angie out of all the look alike kids gliding around on the ice down there.

"Who? C'mon. Ashley and Manny, that's who. Shouldn't you be coordinating two perfect dates right now?"

Craig sighed. Obviously Spinner was not going to let it go.

"They both cancelled, alright! I had plans with both of them but they both cancelled and I don't even know what either of them are doing so are you happy! Just shut up about it, Spinner! God!"

"Alright. Calm down, stud. Didn't mean to touch a nerve,"

Craig felt his hands balling into fists and he wanted to slam one of them right into Spinner's face. He was still smiling that shit eating grin. Ashley and Manny had been acting suspiciously lately, always cancelling things and not telling him where they were going and he didn't like it. Not one bit.

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"You want me to do what?" Manny looked at Ashley across the table. They were at a pizza place, secure in the knowledge that Craig was at the skating rink with Spinner.

"You go to his house tonight and tell him you saw me with another guy, and how happy you are that I'm moving on," Ashley smiled her evil smile, her eyes flat and cold. Manny bit her lip and looked away. She wasn't enjoying this. She knew Craig had been lying to them, she knew, but she didn't like this.

"Okay, Manny?" Ashley stared at her, willing her to do what she wanted her to do.

"I don't know, Ashley…"

"What? What do you mean?"

"I mean, it's mean. Craig, he, he's been through enough stuff that I don't think we should…" For a second Ashley looked guilty, then she shrugged it off.

"Manny, don't go feeling sorry for him. He's brought this upon himself. He can't just toy with my emotions like that, he can't cheat on me and get away with it. I thought he was different, I thought he understood me. Well, I was sure wrong about that. I didn't do that to him, I was true to him and he, he…"she was out of words, just mouthed hollow syllables and thought of twisting the knife on him. She didn't care that he'd been through difficult things, her anger wouldn't let her care. That had nothing to do with it.

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"Craig, I didn't expect to see you here," Craig looked up at the sound of Joey's voice. He stood by the bleachers bundled up in a ridiculously puffy winter jacket and mittens.

"Hi, Mr. Jeremiah," Spinner said.

"So what are you doing here? I thought you had plans with Ashley,"

Craig looked off to the side and Spinner smiled up at Joey.

"Yeah, well, she cancelled. I don't have any plans,"

"You want a ride home with us?" Joey said, beginning to scan the ice for Angela.

"I guess so," He stood up and started to follow Joey toward the ice, and Spinner called out after them, "Hey, Craig, have a fun Saturday night!"

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He was in the garage, it was so cold he could see his breath but he didn't care. Things weren't right, not with Ashley and Manny. He shouldn't be dating both of them, lying to both of them, but he couldn't decide, he couldn't hurt one of them.

He heard footsteps on the stairs, then a small knock on the door. With no idea who it was, he opened the door.

"Hi," Manny, her long hair tucked under a wool hat, her cheeks red from the cold, "I thought I'd find you here,"

"Hey, come in," He swung the door wide and let her in, she brought a blast of the cold with her. Beyond her, before she shut the door he saw the hard ledge of snow glittering in the yard.

"Boy, it's cold in here," she said, taking off her gloves and rubbing her hands together.

"I know," he said, and moved toward her, wrapped her up in his arms, leaned in and kissed her.

"It's so good to see you," he said.

"Yeah, I missed you," she said, and shrugged out of her jacket but kept her scarf on.

"I saw Ashley tonight," Manny said, sitting on the couch, folding her knees up under her. Craig sat next to her.

"Oh yeah?" he said, trying to sound casual and failing miserably.

"Yeah. She was with some guy, they looked pretty cozy. I'm glad she's moving on,"


	5. Chapter 5

Craig still sat on the couch that Manny had just been on, but she left. Opened the door and let in a blast of cold air, smiled her perfect Manny dimpled smile at him and he smiled back but he kept thinking about Ashley. Ashley and some other guy. There had been hints about it, broken dates and his friends saying they thought they saw her here and there with this person and that person but they couldn't be sure.

He closed his eyes, tried to breathe slowly and relax but he wanted to destroy something. His guitar. The drum set behind him, kick a hole in the amp, anything. His hands in tight fists against his thighs, and his breathing was not slow and he wasn't relaxing. Not at all.

He didn't want to go into the house because Joey would ask him what was wrong and wouldn't believe him when he said nothing and he didn't want to discuss it with Joey.

"Ashley," he said softly, and let his hands open up, felt tears wanting to fall. He didn't cry that easily anymore. Not after all the shit that happened last year. He'd built walls.

"Damn it," he muttered, and welcomed the anger that was replacing the need for tears. When he was alone anger was easier to deal with. When he was with people he was afraid when he was angry because he sometimes wanted to hit them, and most times he stopped himself but felt a hint of what his dad might have felt when he was angry. That uncontrollable urge to cause damage to things and people.

He stood up and with the last of his reason tried to find something he could break that didn't matter that much. Not the guitar. Not the other instruments. He picked up a wooden chair and hurled it across the room, feeling better hearing the crash that it made.

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"Hi, hon," Craig looked up. Paige Micalchuk. She stood next to him as he dug out the books from his locker, the sun shining down the hall and off the row of lockers. He was a little surprised. Paige and he didn't seem to talk all that much.

"Hi,"

"Listen, do you know that kid?" She pointed down the hall at some lanky blond kid leaning over the bubbler. Craig peered at him and shook his head.

"No, why?"

"Well, I think Manny's seeing him and I just wondered what he was like. To sort of get an idea if he's good for her. Manny doesn't always use her head when it comes to guys,"

Craig narrowed his eyes and felt that anger trying to rise.

"What? You think he's seeing her?" Anger was very clear in his voice and Paige looked around nervously.

"Yeah, I think he is. At least that's what I heard,"

"From who?" he said quick.

"Oh, I don't know, one of the cheerleaders mentioned it…"

"Maybe they're wrong,"

"Yeah, well ,maybe. But what's it to you?" Paige leveled him with her blue/green eyed stare, a certain rightousness coming into her face and Craig reddened. It should be nothing to him. Officially he was dating Ashley.

"Nothing," he mumbled, and looked away.

"I didn't think so," Paige said, still staring at him although he was looking down. She walked away.

What the hell was this? First Ashley and now Manny, too? Did they think he wouldn't find out? Did they really? The anger was exponential and he closed his eyes and felt like his father, felt almost exactly like him, his fists itching to pound on something.

"Hey, you!" he said, marching over to the lanky blond kid who was straightening up from his drink.

"Yeah?" he said, startled.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Craig said, and shoved him lightly. The kid staggered back and stared at Craig in puzzlement and a touch of fear.

"Huh?"

No more talking. Craig shoved him and he fell, stared up at him in a daze.

"Leave her alone," Craig said, standing over him and punching him, closing his eyes in the relief. It felt so good.

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"Did you hear?" Paige said, her eyes glittering, her smile crooked.

"Hear what?" Ashley said, smiling an evil little smile, too. Manny sipped at her milk through a straw and glanced out over the cafeteria, her eyes worried.

"Well, Craig beat up that kid who I said was dating Manny and he got suspended," Paige laughed and so did Ashley. Manny frowned.

"What is it, Manny?" Paige said, looking at her.

"I don't think this is good. Now he's in trouble," she said.

"He hasn't seen nothing yet," Ashley said, and exchanged a look with Paige. Manny looked away.

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"I can't believe you," Joey said, not looking at him but at the road as he drove home from the school. Craig didn't say anything.

"Would you mind telling me just what in the hell you were thinking?"

"Nothing,"

" 'Nothing,' Well that's just great. 'Nothing,' You beat up some kid over nothing?"

"No,"

"Then why? Huh? What did he do that you had to get yourself suspended over it?"

Craig didn't answer, not sure how to answer, and Joey scowled.

"Craig! Answer me!" Craig sucked in his breath and flinched, sure that this time Joey would hit him like his father used to. He knew he deserved it.

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"What in the hell is going on with you?" Marco said when Craig opened the door.

"Marco, what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be in school?"

"Yeah, but I had a dentist appointment. My mom said I could have the rest of the day off,"

"Good for you," Craig sat on the couch, put his feet up on the coffee table.

"You got suspended?"

"Yep,"

"Why? What happened?" Marco sat down in the chair near him, looking at Craig looking at the T.V. Instead of answering he sighed, put his face in his hands, started crying. Marco saw his shoulders shaking, heard the muffled sound of his crying through his hands.

"Craig? What's wrong?" Marco touched his shoulder lightly and Craig kept crying, not wanting to look at Marco or anyone.


	6. Chapter 6

The crying storm was brief, and soon Craig was just sniffling and staring at Marco. Marco's face was crumpled in concern.

"What is it?" Marco said softly, and Craig let out a shuddery sigh.

"It's Manny, and Ashley,"

"Manny and Ashley?" Marco said.

"Yeah, I've been fooling around with Manny-"

"Craig! Are you crazy? Remember when I told you to tell her how you feel? To tell Ashley that you love her? Remember the flowers and everything? You love Ash, right?"

"Yeah, I do-"

"Then why are you cheating on her?"

"Look, I didn't mean for it to happen, it was just, Manny was there, and she looked so good, and she's so sweet and now I'm confused,"

Marco sat in the chair opposite him and just looked at him, shook his head.

"This is really unbelievable. You love Ash, and I understand you had a hard time telling her that, but cheating on her…that just makes no sense, unless you're that much of a commitment phobe that you'd rather destroy your relationship than actually have one,"

Craig nodded, wiped the tears from his eyes, looked out the window.

"So what are the tears for? Did they find out?"

"No, I don't think so, but I keep hearing things like they're seeing other people, and it's just…"

Marco laughed. Craig looked at him sharply.

"What?"

"Oh, this is rich. You cheat on them, and that's okay, but when you think they're doing it to you, then that's another story. Jesus, Craig, what a double standard,"

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Back at the dot, Manny's hot chocolate in front of her. Ashley had her hazel nut cream coffee with sugar and half and half. Manny unwound her scarf and tucked her gloves into her pocket, cupped the hot chocolate mug with her bare hands and felt some comfort from the warmth.

"It's time to up the ante," Ashley said, the evil gleam in her eyes. Manny's eyes were wet and blinky, and she gulped down some hot chocolate.

"What do you mean?"

"I was thinking I could go on a date somewhere, like the movies or something, and you could be on a date with Craig at the same time and he'd see us,"

"Ashley, Craig wouldn't go to the movies with me. I'm the other woman, remember?"

"Toronto is a big city. There are more movie theaters besides that one in the mall. We'll plan to go to a different one. That's exactly what we'll do. Next Saturday. So go and make the plans with Craig,"

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Off on her mission, and Manny could feel the cold through her gloves, through her scarf and hat and winter coat. It sucked all the blood from her extremities, leaving them white and cold. She didn't want to do this anymore, she didn't want to torture Craig and make him crazy. It felt mean.

She knew that if Joey was home she couldn't see him or even call him because he was grounded. He was grounded because he got suspended for punching that kid he thought was seeing her. That brought a little smile to her lips. He'd fought for her. Maybe he did love her best.

She was in luck. Joey wasn't home yet, his red convertible no where to be found. She went up to the door, knocked, rubbed her hands together in her gloves.

"Manny," Craig, surprise in his voice.

"Hey, can I come in?"


	7. Chapter 7

He hadn't wanted to go to the movies with her, but Manny had persisted. And she was under the impression that he had broken up with Ashley, as promised, so the continued sneaking around didn't make sense.

"We don't have to go to the one at the mall," Manny said, and looked up at him with her big brown eyes and that look, it was always hard for him to refuse.

"Okay, okay,"

All set to go, all bundled up in the scarves and gloves, the winter air glittering all around them, when Joey pulled up. He got out of the car fast and called to them. Craig turned around quick, that look of fear on his face all out of proportion but Manny understood. His father. It was part of what made her feel guilty for being so mean to him.

"Craig? What are you doing?" There was the edge of steel in Joey's voice, and he glared at Craig. Craig looked down at his boots.

"Just, uh, just going to the movies-"

"No, I don't think so. Manny, go home," Joey said, glancing at Manny and then returning his attention to Craig. Manny ducked her head and headed off, whispered bye to Craig. He nodded, still looking way too frightened under Joey's glare. Craig watched her leave, her black hair such a contrast against the white of her coat.

"Craig, you're grounded, remember?"

"Yeah," Craig said softly, his head down.

"You can't just beat up some kid at school and get suspended, you know? And I ground you and you're just gonna take off and go to the movies?" The irritation in Joey's voice was getting deeper, and Craig's breathing was fast and shallow, and he could practically hear Albert, all the times he'd spoken to him sternly and then yelled and then hit him.

"Joey, I know, I mean, I just forgot-"

"Maybe another week of being grounded will help you remember,"

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Manny dialed Ashley on her cell, waited impatiently for her to pick it up, watched her breath plume out in the cold.

"Hello?"

"Ashley, it's Manny. Listen, Craig couldn't go, Joey came home, he's grounded cause of beating up that kid, remember?"

"Oh yeah. Damn," Ashley said, and Manny could practically hear her thinking over the phone.

"It's okay," Ashley said, "I think I've thought of something,"

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Joey sat on the fire place ledge and Craig sat on the couch, slouched down, his legs out straight in front of him.

"Joey, I don't need a lecture,"

"Yes you do. I grounded you. You have been suspended from school. And now you're just going to disregard my rules and go and do whatever it is you want to? You need more than a lecture,"

"Jesus, Joey, just hit me already! Just like dad, so go ahead! I'm screwing up so I have it coming, so just do it! Just quit talking at me, okay?"

Joey closed his eyes, sighed. Felt the fire crackling at his back.

"Craig, try to see that this is different. Albert, your father, he beat you for, for leaving juice glasses on the table or seeing your sister or coming home late. And I know that this is hard for you, discipline. I'm not going to hit you, no matter what you do. But you can't beat a kid up at school, get suspended, and expect to have no consequences. This has nothing to do with Albert, or how he treated you, okay?"

Quiet, sulky, Craig crossed his arms over his chest and said nothing.

"Craig, okay? I can get mad at you, I can be unhappy with your behavior. That's a normal thing, okay? You made a mistake and I don't want you to do that sort of thing again. So I have to give you consequences for your actions, that's all. Got it?"

He looked up at Joey and nodded, whispered 'yeah', and felt like he was going to cry again. He felt like a fucking wreck.

"Okay, one more week of being grounded. That means no going to the movies or having friends over or any of it,"

"Okay,"

Joey got up, went into the kitchen to make tea. Craig went out into the garage, picked up his guitar and made it play some discordant notes that vaguely resembled a popular song. The screeching of the guitar was making him feel a little better.

"Sounds good,"

Craig whirled around and saw Spinner smiling at him.

"Spinner, what are you doing here?"

"Thought I'd stop by,"

"Well, you have to go. I'm grounded, and Joey just got done lecturing me about not doing whatever I damn well please, and he wouldn't want me to have friends over,"

"It'll be fine," Spinner smiled at him.

"No it won't. Look, you have to go,"

"Fine, fine. God. I just wanted to tell you I saw something pretty interesting at the mall tonight,"

"I don't care, just go,"

"Oh, I think you'll care," Spinner said, heading down the walk, "it's about Ashley,"

"What about Ashley?" Craig said.

"Well, I saw her making out with some kid, and I'm pretty sure it wasn't you,"


	8. Chapter 8

Spinner was lying, he had to be. Ashley wasn't seeing anybody, cheating on him, she wasn't. She couldn't be. Just because he was doing it didn't mean she was. It was cold enough in the garage that he could see his breath, and his fingertips were getting cold as he strummed the guitar. Ashley. Damn it. The thought of her with another guy, kissing another guy, was driving him crazy.

There was nothing for it. He'd have to go and see her, to prove to himself that she wasn't seeing some other guy, to prove it once and for all. He put down the guitar and shrugged into his leather coat and scarf again then he remembered. Joey. He was grounded. Goddamnit.

So what? What would Joey do to him? Nothing. Just yell at him and ground him again. It's not like he'd beat him or anything. Grounding didn't matter, not really. Craig closed his eyes and thought about his father for a second, thought about the way his leather belt felt as it came down on his back. Grounding was nothing.

Still he was careful. Made sure Joey couldn't see him or hear him leaving, sinking into the shadows when he thought Joey might be looking out into the darkness. One street away and then two and he didn't have to be so careful anymore. Sped up, his white breath coming faster, and the tips of his fingers and toes were growing numb.

There was Ashley's house, nicer than Joey's was for some reason. The tiny white lights were still in the evergreen shrubs that were beneath the windows, and they twinkled dimly beneath the snow. Craig took a deep breath, afraid of not finding her home. Afraid of what she might say if she was.

His knock was answered by Toby. Toby looked up at him from beneath his thick black rimmed glasses.

"Craig," He didn't move to let him in, just stood there in the doorway, blocking the light and the heat.

"Toby. Can I come in?"

"Sure,"

He stepped aside and let him in. Craig felt the heat of the living room like a real thing, felt it slowly thawing his extremities. He licked his lips.

"Is Ashley here?"

"Ashley? I don't know,"

He wanted to slug Toby. His impassive face, his bored tone. Wanted to grab his shoulders and shake him.

"Well, could you check?"

Toby nodded and headed up the stairs. Craig stared at the ceiling, had a fleeting thought about Joey finding out he was gone. It worried him in that vague and unsettling way that made his mouth feel too dry. Made him feel dizzy.

Ashley came downstairs, her hair had that little flip, the edges a dark red. The dark eye shadow she wore made her eyes look a lighter blue. She smiled at him, her hand lightly trailing the banister as she descended the stairs.

"Hi, Craig,"

"Hi," He said it tight and he didn't smile.

"What are you doing here? I thought you were grounded?" There was a playfulness and a teasing in her voice that he didn't like.

"Yeah, I am. So what? Listen, we need to talk,"

"We do?" She said with mock innocence, staring at him with wide eyes.

"C'mon," he said, and took hold of her arm hard and pulled her upstairs and into her room. Once inside he shut the door and she yanked her arm out of his grasp. She sat hard on the bed and now her expression was stone cold.

"Okay. What?" she said.

"Look, Spinner came over and said, he said he saw you making out with someone else…"

"Well, I wasn't. Spinner is a liar. Craig, do you think I'd cheat on you? Betray your trust like that? What sort of a person do you think I am? Huh?"

He breathed out hard through his nose, looked away from her. Caught the edge of his reflection and hers in the big mirror above her dresser.

"It's not the only thing I've heard, I've heard other things, about you being with other guys…"

"You believe everything you hear?" she said so fast and so angrily that it took him off guard.

"It's not like I went out and bought some other guy a Christmas present, and told that other guy that I'd broken up with you, that I had 'moved on', it isn't like I did that. So what if Spinner says I was with another guy or kissed another guy because that isn't the truth, so fuck you Craig. Just go to hell,"

She turned away from him, but he could see the tears coursing down her cheeks. He stared at her, at the way the light made her eyes shine, at the reflections in her tears.


	9. Chapter 9

He watched her cry, didn't know what to say. But at least it was clear to him now. She knew about Manny.

"Did, did Manny tell you?" he said softly, and she looked at him, anger shining through the tears.

"No, Craig, not like that. We figured it out. How could you?"

He hung his head. How could he? What could he say?

"I don't know, it just sort of got started and then I couldn't stop it," That sounded good, but she looked at him like he was a bullshit liar, and he supposed she had a point.

"I thought what we had was…special…I thought…" she said, kind of speaking around crying, and he felt so terrible. So low. So indefensible.

"Now it feels like it was all a lie," she said, shaking her head.

"You better go," she said, "I don't have anything else to say to you,"

He left, head down, bundling into his winter clothes again. The cold out there was nothing compared to what Ashley had put him through. Walking slow despite the cold, almost hoping Joey would find that he had gone out. Anything to take his mind off of what he had done.

So Manny knew, too. They both had known and had let him think they were cheating. Craig rubbed his hands together through the gloves, trying to fight off the numbness. He could feel his cheeks getting red and the tip of his nose growing cold.

At home Joey was waiting, that angry look on his face, the way he looked when he took the car, when he took Ang to the park. Too numb to feel the fear he usually felt when Joey was pissed.

"What the hell, Craig? I said you were grounded and you go out? I just can't trust you at all, can I?"

Craig stared at him, some of the fear creeping through. He closed his eyes, knowing rationally that Joey wouldn't hit him. But so much of him wasn't rational.

"Say something, at least," Joey said, and Craig noticed the flaring nostrils, the gritted teeth. He licked his lips.

"I'm, uh, I'm sorry, okay? What do you want me to say? I had to go somewhere,"

"No, Craig, you didn't. You didn't have to go anywhere. What you had to do was listen to me when I tell you that you are grounded and are not going anywhere. You need to start accepting the consequences for your actions,"

That last thing Joey said hit him hard, and he winced. Nodded.

"Okay, Joey, I know. Please, I said I was sorry, okay?"

Joey stood up quick and Craig flinched back, saw the flash of his father's raised fist, couldn't breathe. Knew that Joey was talking but at first couldn't decipher what it was he was saying. Joey shook him gently.

"Craig, hey. Craig,"

Craig looked up at him, saw the angry look fading and concern taking its place.

"Go upstairs, okay? Go ahead,"

Upstairs, his room, the walls closing in on him. They both knew. Manny and Ashley. They were both pissed at him, and could he blame them? At all? No. He screwed up. He did. He'd have to start to accept the consequences of what he had done.

Grounded, lost both girls, things were looking bleak. He guessed it was pretty bleak when you were accepting consequences. There was no where to go with it, no one to turn to and no one to blame, because he had done it himself.


	10. Chapter 10

School, all covered in snow. Christmas lights twinkling here and there, paper decorations strung up in the halls. The home ec rooms baking cookies and pies, and the delicious smells wafting out into the halls and the stairwells. Craig walked along, his scarf wrapped loosely around his neck, his boots covered in snow. He didn't know where Manny was but he'd find her. She was all he had left.

He saw her, her long black hair curling in a ponytail. He headed toward her, smiling. She didn't smile back.

"Hey, Manny," he said, and she looked at him with that hurt look.

"What?" he said, but he knew. He thought he knew.

"Nothing," she shook her head, turned away from him.

"What?" he persisted, and she wouldn't look at him. The bell rang, and everybody else tumbled out of their classrooms and filled all the spaces between them. He grabbed her sleeve and she let him take it, her eyes on the ground.

"Can we go somewhere and talk?" he said, and she shrugged. He pulled her along to one of the empty classrooms, just like he had when he gave her the presents.

"Tell me what's wrong," he said, trying to get her to look at him. When she did her eyes were shiny with tears, and her lip quivered.

"Craig, you know what's wrong. You know. It's Ashley. You were still seeing her when you told me you had broken up with her. I was patient. I gave you time but you…you lied to me. And I know Ashley loved you, but not as much as I did,"

He took a shuddery deep breath. Could he say enough fancy things to keep her?

"Manny, I know. I lied to you, I'm sorry. But I was wrong, I know I was. And I meant what I said, it is you. Please, Manny, please forgive me," And he gave her his best pleading look, took her hands in his. She let him do it but looked down, shook her head.

"How can I believe you? How can I believe you now? Craig, I just don't trust you, not at all. You hurt me so much. It's never been like this. I can feel the pain of this every minute and nothing you say can take it away. I wish it wasn't like this, because I love you. I know I do. But I can't be with you, it isn't good for me to be with you. I'm sorry,"

She was crying now, the tears coming fast, and she stood up, put her arms around him. He could smell the apple shampoo she used. She whispered in his ear, "I love you" so broken and sad and she squeezed him tight and then let go.

"Okay, Craig, bye," she said, walking backwards, keeping her eyes on him like he was someone dangerous. She left and closed the door and he was in the dark empty classroom alone.

So that was it, both bridges burned. What a major fuck up. How did he ever think he could pull it off? He shook his head and unwrapped the scarf from around his neck. Manny made this scarf. He felt the soft wool with his fingertips. There was a coat rack in the corner of the classroom and he hung it up there. Pulled his hat low over his eyes and left the room. So he'd fucked up big time with Manny and Ash, but there were plenty of other girls in this sea.

In the hallway he tried to catch some girls' eyes, and some of them smiled at him. He'd be fine. Maybe next time he could remain faithful, but maybe not. After all, he was just 15, it wasn't like he was getting married or anything. If Manny and Ashley couldn't understand that it was their loss, wasn't it?


End file.
